I have anxiety. Especially the last few years after my divorce and with the pandemic, it seems to be a constant companion. There is an undercurrent of worry.
Am I going to be ok?
Am I going to be able to support myself?
Is my child going to be ok?
Will I get sick? Will my family?
Am I doing enough?
Can I handle homeschooling and 2 careers?
This list is just a small sampling of the things I worry about. 🙁
From the moment I wake up, to the moment I go to sleep, I find myself with this constant companion. I have tools that I use that help keep it manageable like cluing in when I find my mind, my chest and my body tight. I stop what I’m doing throughout the day, take a deep breath and try and release it. It’s almost like magic how well it works.
I’ve also made it a goal to incorporate dancing into my day, and believe me, when I am stressed? I don’t think I have time to dance. I don’t want to dance, but I DO want to change my energy…and so, I dance. And you know what? It helps.
A few months ago, I purchased the Calm app and I find it helps me to drown out the loud children, the barking dogs, the shrieking YouTubers and my anxious thoughts. Listening to the music brings all of the noise down to a manageable level so I can function and even enjoy some of the day.
“My goal is to accept my life as it is.”
The hardest part of anxiety for me is my struggle against it. I don’t want it to be a constant companion. Sometimes, I feel like I SHOULDN’T feel this way. I hate that I feel this way. I fall into the trap of thinking my mind should be filled with rainbows and unicorns because I’m a life coach. But, while rainbows and unicorns are very much enjoyed and appreciated, that’s just not the goal.
The goal is to experience a full life. The pain, the ick, the hard AND the magical moments. My goal is to accept my life as it is. Right now. What do I need to be ok in the little moments, because those are ultimately what create the big picture that is my life.
How I treat myself in this moment, right now, matters. Learning to accept and work with reality is exactly what my practice is all about. Do you have anxiety? I’d love to hear your story and share tools with you so that you can live your very best life. Anxiety may be my companion right now, but she hangs out in the backseat. She is no longer allowed to be in the driver’s seat.
If you struggle with anxiety, I hope you know you are not alone.