Do you feel like there just isn’t enough time to show up fully to work, your spouse, your kids, your home, your friends, your church, your community, your country?
Oh wait, I forgot about you. I’m sure you have needs and desires for yourself that have nothing to do with any of those other commitments. What about personal development time? Self reflection, exercise, a healthy mind and body…It seems like we keep piling on expectations for ourselves without a plan on how to get it all done. And when we do, we are EXHAUSTED.
Here’s the big problem, when we exhaust ourselves in an effort to get it all done, we tend to sleep less, put food/alcohol/drugs/technology in our bodies that isn’t beneficial for long term health and wellness, and in general our ability to make good decisions tanks.
We then become trapped in this exhausted loop. Time is the enemy, and our self satisfaction levels drop. Our bodies require more food/alcohol/drugs/technology to get that hit to keep us going. Our anxiety sky rockets. I’ve been here, and you know how I felt? TERRIBLE. I felt like I was in a rat race, and I was running and running…and I didn’t even know how it had started or where I was going.
So, you know what I did? I pushed pause. My brain wanted to tell me there was no time to pause. It was convinced pausing would mean I would lose the race.
“But, I realized I didn’t WANT to compete in the rat race!”
What to do if not race? I turned to myself with curiosity and love. I started writing about what was important to me, and why. It turns out all of the same things were on my list: healthy mind, body, relationships and showing up in all important facets of my life…but I wanted to approach them in a way that felt inspiring instead of punitive. EnjoyableHow could I create a life that I truly loved to live? How could I give MORE of myself and to myself when I already couldn’t keep up?
First, I took a look at my relationship with time. Were there areas where I chose to engage in activities that hindered my health instead of supported? Could I give myself grace when activities took longer than expected? What if I viewed time as working in my favor instead of working against me?
“Could I give myself grace?”
Second, I developed a loving, kind and generous relationship with myself. I realized that I didn’t like living in my own body and mind…I mean, I’ve always known this, but I never realized that it was a choice, and I had no idea the damage I was causing myself by continually criticizing myself and allowing myself to treat myself with disrespect.
Once I re-evaluated time, decided there is enough time, and I consistently treated myself with kindness and respect…my energy flourished. I WANTED to show up, and I was excited to be able to. I think the motivation and intention behind our actions is crucial to sustained energy for life. We have to implement healthy habits in order to achieve our desired results and keep them.
I may still be running a race, but it’s all on my own time table. I get to take breaks. I get to decide which direction I want to go. I get to run with enthusiasm, excitement and the knowledge that I always have my own back. And, I know the “pause” button is always there…because we need to stop fighting ourselves and start fighting for ourselves.
With much love to you,