Next month, my bestie and I are going to have 3 days alone together in a beautiful condo in sunny Prescott, AZ. No spouses, parents or kids!
A few months ago she texted me and asked me if I realized that we have NEVER spent time alone together. There are always parents, spouses, or children with us. We have been friends for 25 years! We met as pre-teens while we were both attending Family Week in Provincetown MA … As the story goes, she pretty much followed me around and forced me to be her best friend. It’s not an entirely inaccurate description of the beginning of our relationship…I was a very shy person who hoped to blend into the walls and never be seen and she was jumping up and down saying, I see you! I love you! I want to be your best friend lol. And so she was.
Over the years, we’ve flown back and forth across the country to attend graduations, weddings, to meet each other’s new babies. We’ve vacationed with our families…but never just the two of us.
Where did we want to go? We didn’t care, we just wanted to be together.
One of the fun things about planning this trip has been that both of us are feeling more excited in our daily lives with something to look forward to. We got to condo shop and we are sending bestie tattoo ideas back and forth. It’s given us an opportunity to breath new life into our relationship and our everyday pandemic living lives.
We’ve also both noticed other feelings coming up that feel… less exciting. Both of us were feeling guilty about taking time and money away from our families for something that is for pure enjoyment. So, it’s sparked some really great conversations between us, and we’ve written a new story together about how taking this trip will actually contribute abundance in our lives, not scarcity. It’s contributing to the greater good, not detracting.
We are already seeing that in the days leading up to the trip. We are feeling excited and we show up very different with our families and to our careers when we come from a place of excitement versus a place of the mundane that daily life (especially during covid times) can bring. So, when those fears crept up, I was so proud of us because we acknowledged them and talked about all the ways in which this trip is beneficial, and found that our fears had quieted down after we saw the big list of abundance this trip was bringing to our lives.
As each issue comes up, we are talking through them and using them as opportunities to think and feel differently. We deserve to clean up our thinking and enjoy the heck out of the 3 days we spend together just the two of us. We don’t have to accept every thought that pops into our head as fact. We don’t HAVE to feel guilty for pausing working our asses off so we can spend a little time rejuvenating.
I don’t think we are alone in these feelings of guilt around taking time off and going on vacation. This is a thing we as humans do. We reach our threshold for being able to accept good things in our lives. It starts to feel uncomfortable when we start to stretch outside of the comfort zone. If left unnoticed, our brains will continue to supply us with thoughts that serve to knock us back down into a zone that is familiar and comfortable. So, our job if we want to be able to grow and fully accept a life of abundance and good fortune is to learn to recognize when this is happening and to re-write the script.
Next time you plan a trip, I encourage you to pay extra attention to your mind. What do you notice? Do you have any recurring thoughts? Do you feel anxious? Do you tend to fight with your spouse when you’re on vacation or getting ready for one? Are there ways you are sabotaging your trip before you even get there?
Leave me a comment and let me know if you’ve noticed this in your life.
Want to hear more? Check out this week’s podcast:
You Get to Go on Vacation